“Just Holding Her Hand and Walking Her Home”

A Final Update on My Karen April 11, 2017

One week ago this evening at around 10:30 my Karen left her home on Longford Avenue in Elyria to go to her real home in Heaven.

We started dating in January of 1969 in our senior year in high school. I just couldn’t believe that she said “yes” when I asked her on that first date. I was so ready for her to say “no.” I had memorized my little speech of accepting her refusal graciously. Then it happened! She said “yes!” I was so thrilled. The first date went pretty well. I soon asked her for another date and she accepted. By the third date she actually said, “Yes. I would like that.” Never did I ever date anyone else.

Over time as we dated more seriously I discovered that she like to hold my hand. We were learning much more about each other. We were learning more of our individual backgrounds, our likes and dislikes, our opinions, preferences, and convictions. We soon discovered that we had very different personalities and abilities. However! We discovered that we shared much in common. Most importantly, we both discovered that we shared the desire to serve the Lord. We both loved the Lord Jesus Christ and were committed to serving Him full time vocationally. It wouldn’t be long before we discovered that it was His will for us to serve Him together the rest of our lives.

We loved to hold hands as we had devotions together. We loved to hold hands on walks. We loved to hold hands when we were just sitting and talking on her parent’s porch or in my parent’s living room. We enjoyed time with both her parents and family and mine as well. Every weekend I’d come home from Bible College and couldn’t wait to see her. Then in the evening around 10:30, I would hold her hand as I walked her to her parent’s front door to say “Good night for now. I’ll see you soon. I’ll be glad when we are married and I won’t have to be apart from you!” I’d kiss her and then turn and walk from her front porch. She was home; but I wasn’t. It was time for me to be on my way.

At just about 10:30 on this evening a week ago, while holding her hand, it was time to say “I’ll see you soon. It won’t be long Honey. I will be coming along very soon.” She died holding my hand. She didn’t fight it. The wonderful folks at Hospice worked diligently with our Christina to keep her comfortable. We got into several situations and the nurses were here very quickly and worked with the doctor to keep her comfortable. She wasn’t afraid. She just slowly and quietly left me to go Home. I had the privilege and supreme joy and heartbreak at the same time to hold her hand and walk her home.

This will be the last update on my Karen. She is very well today. My Karen was a wonderful wife, mother, grandmother, and great-grandmother (if you are doing the math and wondering how a sixty-five year old lady became a great-grandmother several years ago, the answer is that we adopted older children when we were very young.) She immediately met the Lord Jesus as she left her hospital bed in our living room (2 Corinthians 5:8).  This was made possible because she placed her trust in Christ alone for her salvation (John 14:6). Everything about her home in Heaven is better than anything could be on earth (Philippians 1:23). She is freed from sickness, pain, suffering, and cancer (Revelation 21:4). She is so very well.

I have never known such profound heartbreak. For two years I have watched my dear Karen go through so much as she sought to glorify the Lord (1 Corinthians 10:31; Philippians 1:20). I miss her terribly. But I am certainly very happy for her. I am thrilled to know where she is, with Whom she is, and that I am on my way there as well (John 14:1-3). So I begin the new part of my journey. I don’t like it. I am not accustomed to being on any journey without my Karen. I wouldn’t choose it for myself if I had the choice. But this is what God has planned for me.

So I am slowly starting to walk away from the point on the journey where my Karen left me for a little while. I would like to just stop right here, do nothing more, and wait for my turn to come Home. I am being very transparent.  But I know that I cannot do this. I want to be a gracious, submissive, servant of the Lord. I have much to learn on this journey of singleness once again. My new posts when they come will be thoughts from a man who is heading home and seeking to finish strongly.  I have experienced several things already and I am eager to share them with you next time.  Thank you for your faithful partnership on the journey. Karen and I have been blessed by your friendship and fellowship.